Coorlim
2004-02-05 06:18:26 UTC
Began: 02-03-2004
This is the latest incarnation of Magical Moogle Sailor Mog. Consider
it a re-write. None of the characters presented below are entirely in
line with their creator's vision. This is intentional. Following
each chapter are notes delineating who they are in this story.
All fictional characters are the intellectual property of their
creators, but the wrinkles in your brain are yours alone.
---
Magical Moogle Sailor Mog
by Coorlim
Begin with a dimension of abstract thought given life. A dimension
created by the creative process of great minds and sustained by
generations of belief. A dimension filled with the myths and legends
of humanity, freed to live as they would cut off from their creators,
eagerly seeking to expand past their boundaries to become something
more, yet equally eager to have even as little free will as we, yet
again burdened with the omnipotent knowledge that such a feat can
never be accomplished. their names are Zeus and Gilgamesh and Beowulf
and Yaweh and Baal and Indra; they are legion, and they are filled
with an envious hatred for us.
Shift a little bit closer to us, still within the realm of imagination
but closer to home both temporally and in identifiability. This
dimension too is created by the act of creation and sustained with
less rote but often more rabid devotion. This dimension is much
younger, created by the popular culture of the day, ofttimes burning
out and being reborn. In ages past this was home to beings calling
themselves Tom Sawyer and Sherlock Holmes and Vlad Dracul and Doc
Savage. They come and go as their presence in our minds waxes and
wanes, but now this realm is populated by beings knowing themselves as
Buffy and Mulder and Goku and Pikachu. They are like unto the Gods
and Demons of that other dimension, but are not cursed with the
knowledge of their true natures. They live and learn and love in
their reality, slipping from our control the moment they are born from
our minds.
Zoom in.
The primary object in this dimension (though not necessarily the
largest) is a vaguely spherical planetoid. their "earth". Even from
orbit its deviation from our home is visible. Much of it is an almost
impossibly large urban sprawl known to its dwellers simply as The
City. Surrounding the city is a narrow belt of suburbia, and beyond
that a shifting and malleable wilderness.
Zoom in.
The City itself seems to be constructed of a mishmash of contemporary
styles, but inspection reveals that it is loosely divided into
districts. Each of these districts bears a resemblance to and wears
the name of one of our cities on earth. Chicago district, New York
district, London district, Tokyo district, Hong Kong district... they
are uncountable, and sometimes move and shift about when they think
that nobody is looking. For their part, the dwellers never seem to
notice.
The dwellers of story have their own stories.
-----
Just beyond the suburbs in a peaceful grove in a peaceful tree, a
moogle lays dreaming. He has a cute little cottage in the tree, as
moogles are wont to do. When asked to describe the living habits of
wild moogles, City University Kawaiiology major Shiratori Azusa noted
that they "have the decorating taste and fashion sense of my
grandmother." If this is considered to be accurate, then this moogle
was living the moogle lifestyle to its fullest. Everything was
decorated in light pastels. Delicate lace doilies protected its
precious furniture from errant mugs of delicious hot cocoa. There
were ceramic figurines everywhere.
The moogle itself, Mog by name, was sleeping peacefully in a
comfortable bed with a multicolored quilt drawn up around itself.
Externally, Mog was your typical moogle. About two feet tall, covered
in soft white fur, delicate red nose, wings, and a stubby little tail.
Oh, and a kupo. Mog was proud of his kupo. It stood up straight and
proud from his forehead, a natural curve to it but without any sag.
What was often referred to by non-moogles as "that stupid ball thing
on your head" was a source of great pride for all moogles, and all of
the ones Mog knew agreed that his kupo was fairly impressive.
In his sleep Mog was having THAT dream again. You know the one.
You're sitting in school, and suddenly you notice that you're bare
ass nekkid. Mog hated that dream, but he wasn't sure why as he'd
never been to a school in his life (his parents had him home schooled)
and moogles didn't wear any clothes... well, his cousin Kug wore a T-
shirt, but nobody liked to talk about it.
Fortunately, Mog's nightmare was interrupted by the shrill ringing of
his alarm clock. "Ku...?" he mumbled, glaring at it blearily with one
eye. It was bright yellow and shaped like a large yellow bird.
"KUPO!" Mog sword upon seeing the time, leaping from his bed as if it
were on fire. In his rush to the bathroom, he almost knocked over his
display case of ceramic Hummel figures. After a quick shower, he
grabbed a sack filled with... things... and ran out the door.
---
Mog raced fretfully along the road leading from his home forest
towards the City. As he half-ran, half-flew along (Moogles are good at
neither) a young blonde man on a motorcycle pulled up next to him,
inadvertently pelting the freshly showered moogle with road dust.
"Hey Mog!" asked his friend Cloud, slowing his bike to match the
moogle's progress. "What's the hurry, little guy?"
"Kupo!" Mog managed to wheeze, out of breath from the long ten minute
rush from his house, almost an entire two-hundred meters from his
house.
Cloud raised an eyebrow at the exhausted moogle. "Late? Late for
what? You don't DO anything."
Mog gasped and wheezed as he let this sink in. He blinked and stopped
running. Cloud was not so fortunate with his attention diverted to
the moogle and rammed into a telephone pole. Concerned, Mog wandered
up to him.
"Kupopo?"
Cloud winced, getting up. "Ow. Nah, I'm fine," he sighed deeply,
righting his motorcycle. "As long as you're up, you may as well join
me on my way to Aeris's place in the Burbs.
"Kupo!" Mog corrected.
Cloud shrugged, lifting Mog up into his bike's sidecar. "Aeris,
Aerith, who cares? Its all about the nookie!"
Mog joined his friend in a ribald snicker, but he was fairly clueless
when it came to matters of human sexuality. He was vaguely aware that
humans did have two different genders, but knew it was impolite to
ask one of them which one they were.
After a quick if somewhat erratic drive into the Burbs, Cloud and Mog
arrived at Aeris's (or Aerith's) house. Like most houses in the
Burbs, it was a white two story ranch style house with spacious front
and back yards surrounded by a white picket fence. Cloud admired the
fact that although Aeris was a high school senior like himself, she
had her own place, one that she had inherited when her parents had
died in that horrible and mysterious car crash last year. He had no
idea why she got all quiet whenever he told her how lucky she was that
both her parents were dead. Sometimes he wished his mom would die...
he'd learned to keep thoughts like that to himself, though.
Mog followed Cloud as he strode up the front walk to knock on the
door, sniffing at all of the interesting things laying about her yard.
Flowers, rocks, old newspapers... all had a story to tell, and Mog
wanted to hear all of them. After a moment or so Aeris opened her
door, wearing a red silk robe.
"Cloud!" she muttered, "What a... surprise..."
"Hiya Honey!" Cloud replied joyfully, kissing her chastely on the
cheek. "D'ja miss me?"
Aerith glanced over her shoulder briefly, then looked back at Cloud.
"Yeah... sure... gimmie a second to pick up a bit..."
She closed the door and Cloud spun around to face the moogle almost
angrily. "Do NOT mess this up for me, Mog!"
Behind Cloud a window opened almost silently to emit a tall, dark
haired man naked except the black and red trench coat that he was
hurriedly slipping on. Mog vaguely recognized him as Vincent. Mog
was about to wave to them when Cloud snapped his fingers, catching his
attention again.
"Listen, Mog, things between Aeris and I haven't been going so well
lately. I think its cuz she's a virgin, and intimidated by my
sexuality. If I'm gonna pop that cherry, everything has got to go
just right, you got it?"
Mog sighed as behind Cloud Vincent helped Tifa out of the window,
wearing nothing but a satin sheet. He helped her silently to the
ground and the two of them crept silently away, keeping an eye on
Cloud. This saddened Mog, apparently they'd missed some sort of
costume party.
"Do you understand?" Cloud asked again.
"Kupo," Mog acknowledged. It was just as well, he'd left his Loch
Ness Monster costume at home, and he didn't think Cloud was wearing a
costume... he always dressed like that.
"Good," Cloud grunted, apparently satisfied. He stood up just as
Aeris re-opened the front door, this time dressed in a frumpy and
conservative house dress.
"Come on in," she beckoned, opening the door wide. "Its just me here,
all by myself." She gestured, showing that no one was left inside,
except for Barret, who was disguised as a lamp.
Cloud sniffed. The entire place smelled slightly of incense. He'd
decided that he'd make Aeris give up all of that hippy crap when she
married him.
"Why Cloud," began Aeris, looking down at Mog. "You've brought along
a... thing."
Mog bowed deeply to Aeris. "Kupo!"
Leaping on the topic of conversation, Cloud eagerly pointed at his
friend. "This is my good friend Mog. He's a moogle. You want him?"
Aeris glanced over into the kitchen. "I wouldn't know what to feed
it..."
Cloud smacked Mog's hand, which had been scratching another far less
appropriate part of the moogle's anatomy.
"Why don't you have a seat on the couch?" Aeris suggested. "I'll...
be right back."
While Aeris hurried into the kitchen to tell Cid to shut the fuck up,
her boyfriend was here, and to sneak out the back way, Cloud sat
himself down on the couch and put his feet up on a footstool that
looked quite a bit like Red XIII with a tablecloth draped over him.
Moments later Aeris returned from the kitchen, wiping her mouth. She
winced as the back door slammed shut.
"Gee, Aeris," Cloud commented. "I think yer lamp might be busted. I
keep pulling on the lamp cord, but all it does is make an odd grunting
noise..."
"Uh, Cloud?" Aeris interrupted him. "Your little friend seems to be
urinating on my rug."
Cloud's head whipped around to see the errant moogle doing just what
had been described.
"MOG! NOOO!"
Mog looked up at his friend, not pausing in his urinational joy.
"Kupo?"
-----
"You've REALLY done it this time, Mog!" Cloud yelled at the cowering
moogle.
The pair of them were standing in the street in front of Aeris's
house. She'd drawn the curtains and begun to imagine that they'd gone
away.
"Kupo..." Mog muttered sadly, staring at his toes. He hadn't meant to
befoul his friend's friend's carpet, he was just confused by the color
scheme and had thought it to be a urinal.
"No excuses!" Cloud interrupted. "You've ruined my relationship with
Aeris!"
"Ku..." Mog began, tugging on Cloud's pant leg. Angrily, he tore
himself away, turning his back on the poor moogle.
"I never want to see you again!" Cloud screamed.
A rusty iron spike driven deep into his heart, Mog choked off a sob
and reached trembling for Cloud's pant leg again. Furious, the blond
human tore away and stalked off into the night. Bursting into tears,
Mog ran off into the night.
---
A savage and uncaring rain pelted the tiny moogle as he wandered the
streets of the Kowloon ward. Unlike most of the Hong Kong district,
one of the City's great island districts, the Kowloon ward was part of
the mainland. It wasn't a particularly nice ward, and the few people
out in the driving rain that noticed Mog were giving him speculative
glances.
Moogles were somewhat uncommon in the city, but everyone had at least
heard of one, or seen one on the popular sitcom "Thats my Moogle!" It
was generally accepted that despite the fact that their entire language
seemed to consist of simply the word "kupo" they were sentient
creatures with all of the rights of any other person. Still, some
people wondered what they tasted like.
Out of breath and waterlogged, Mog stopped under an awning to rest.
He was miserable, freezing and soaking wet. He sneezed. Realizing
that he'd almost certainly get sick if he didn't get dry soon, he
pushed his way into the door at his side.
The interior of the shop was dimly lit by a number of curious smelling
candles. Mixing in with the warm smell of the wax was an even
curiouser aromic mix of musk and incense. It would have made Mog
sleepy had it not been for the strange designs on the walls. Most of
them looked like interconnected concentric circles. Somehow they made
his brain throb. He was about to turn back out onto the street when a
soft voice called from beyond a beaded curtain, "Leaving so soon?"
Mog squinted into the dim light as a woman emerged from the back room.
She was tall, her dark skin contrasting with ivory white hair.
Although Mog couldn't see her too well, it looked like she has some
kind of strange markings on her face. She seemed to be looking around
for something, a bit confused.
"Kupo," called Mog from the ground. The woman blinked and looked at it
for a moment in obvious surprise. "A moogle..." she muttered,
"interesting."
She stepped forward into the front of her shop carrying a silver tray.
"Why go out into the rain, Little One," she purred, "when you can dry
off in here and have a nice cup of tea?"
Mog considered while it tried to remember what its mother had told him
about taking things from strange ladies. "Kupo?" it asked.
"Yes," the woman laughed. "I have crumpets."
Deciding that his mother was probably pro mystery tea and crumpets
(she was that kind of lady), Mog waddled up to the table that the lady
had set the tray upon and sat upon the milk carton she had placed upon
a chair for it.
"My name is Urd," the woman introduced, pouring it a cup of tea, "and
I'm a fortune teller."
"Kupo-po," Mog smirked, dunking something that it'd found on his run
through the city into his tea.
Urd smiled indulgently. "Oh, a skeptic?" Mog nodded. "Then you don't
mind if I read your... paw... do you?"
Mog shrugged, sipping its tea. It was all bullshit anyway.
Everything faded the moment Urd took Mog's paw, suddenly, and without
pretext. He found himself floating in a vast dark sky, high above what
looked sort of like his favorite miniature golf course. There was a
castle, and he thought he could see a windmill, but there was just a
village where Abraham Lincoln should be.
His perspective shifted, zooming low towards the castle, and he noticed
that it was populated with moogles! That would, he decided, half to
make this castle much larger than the one over at the Par King, or
would make those some damn small moogles. He was about to start
looking for the hole that the ball went into when a disturbance caught
his eye.
A rift had appeared in the air in the middle of the courtyard, seeming
to be a tear in the fabric of time and space itself. From it emerged
two disgusting looking demons who immediately took it upon themselves
to begin slaughtering the castle moogles. Mog covered his eyes in fear.
When he peeked again, the demons had made it to the inner keep and were
trying to break through its walls. Much to his surprise, a moogle that
looked exactly like himself (and they can tell the difference) wearing
a crown appeared at the top of the keep.
"KUPO!" the vision-mog shouted, leaping over the castle wall, a strange
glowing energy streaming from his limbs. He was followed by a number
of similarly glowing moogles, all echoing the battle cry. Just as the
battle was joined, Mog's vision faded to black again.
Snapped back to reality inside of the fortune teller's shop, Mog
tumbled off of his milk carton, cracked his head on her table, and
flipped the tea set over on top of him. Only the scalding heat of the
tea kept him from slipping unconscious, and he immediately leapt up and
started to run around, screaming. Urd watched this in horror for a few
moments before throwing a bucket of cold water on him.
"Ku... KUPO?!?" Mog sputtered, staring wildly at the woman.
"Well, you seemed like you were burnt, so I grabbed the bucket I was
using for the leak in the kitchen's roof..." Urd began lamely.
"Kupo," Mog cried dismissively. "KUPO!" he finished, waving his arms
vaguely.
"Oh, that," Urd finished, picking up her tea set. "That was a vision
of the past."
"Kupo?" Mog considered. "Kupo kupo."
Urd looked slyly over at the confused moogle. "Why, your past, Prince
Mog."
"Kupo?" Mog asked, almost laughing. "Kupo ku-popo."
A solemn look took over Urds face. "PRINCE Mog, there is a very good
reason you don't remember any of that. The world as it is now is not
as it always was... even history itself is mutable to those who can
bend time to their will. "
Mog snorted. She must have drugged his tea... she was obviously
unhinged. "Kuuuupo," he chuckled, heading back to the door.
"Wait, Mog!" Urd cried.
"Kupo!" Mog cried cheerfully as he stepped out the door. Urd sighed as
she watched him leave. With a wave of her hand, the tea set and table
cleaned itself up.
The moogle... she hadn't been expecting that one to be the first. The
communications gulf wasn't a problem... she could speak every language
that had been spoken, and a few that hadn't. It was just going to be
difficult to use a moogle as she intended to use the first.
She was considering changing 'the plan' when the decision was taken
from her hands.
---
Mog chuckled again as he trod off down the street. Him! A prince!
He was sure he'd remember something like that. No, it was most likely
that the crazy Urd lady was just trying to drug and kidnap him in
order to do things to him. He didn't know what kind of things, but he
was sure he wouldn't like them. He couldn't wait to tell Cloud about
it!
He almost stumbled at that thought. Cloud, his friend, hated him. He
didn't like to dwell on it overmuch, but it had never been that easy
for Mog to make friends. Sad as it seemed, most humans couldn't
understand plain mooglish. Beyond that, he really didn't have many
moogle friends either. He wasn't a self-hating moogle, he just
preferred the company of humans.
And now... now he had nobody. He was alone, again, just like before...
Mog snapped out of his introspection to notice that he'd wandered into
a narrow dead end alleyway. He was a country moogle, but even he knew
what a dangerous predicament that was. He turned to leave, only to
hear something slither through the trash lining the alley.
Instinctively he froze.
At first, all he could hear was his own heartbeat and the dripping of
water from the gutters on the buildings to the street. Maybe, he
hoped, it was just a cat, or a bum. He took a tentative step towards
the alley's mouth, only to hear the slithering sound behind him, the
sound sending him into a panicked scamper.
Pain lanced through the moogle's body as something struck him from
behind, almost tearing his left wing. Mog went tumbling through the
air, rolling when he hit the ground. He blinked and sat up, just in
time to see an enormous tentacle swinging in his direction.
Again Mog tried to dodge out of the way, but he was nowhere near fast
enough. The tentacle, almost as thick as the moogle himself, lashed
him fast across the face breaking open the skin of his forehead.
Blinded by blood and pain, the moogle scrambled madly for cover,
leaping behind a pair of garbage cans.
Urd's image appeared in his mind's eye, superimposed against the gritty
Kowloon streets. "-sure you're doing that right?" she was asking
someone that Mog couldn't see. As if noticing him, she suddenly stood
perfectly straight and addressed him imperially. "Still don't believe
in magic, Prince Mog?"
"Kupo!" Mog nodded vigorously. "Kupo... Kupo-po!"
Urd's face grew a little grim. "I would stop it if I could, Mog, but
none of it is my doing. What is attacking you is a demon, like those
in your vision, and it will kill you if it can."
"Kupo? Ku-po!" Mog begged so pathetically it almost made Urd cry. He
could hear the tentacle thing snuffling around, looking for him.
Urd shook her head sadly. "I cannot help you, Prince Mog, only you can
fight them."
"Kupo?!?" Mog asked incredulously. "Kupo!"
"You must fight them, Prince Mog, or you will die." Seeing his fear,
Urd's face softened. "Take this," she said, handing him a wand. "The
demons have stolen much of your power, but if you wave that wand and
say," she paused, rolling her eyes. "Moogle Powers Activate," she
seemed to shudder, "you will be able to access those that you still
have."
Mog looked down at the wand in awe. A magic wand! He held it aloft
and spoke, "KUPO!"
In a flash of light time seemed to slow down, and the street appeared
to be brightly lit by an ambient purple glow. Mog felt himself lifted
into the air, slowly and gently, as light and cloth streamed from the
end of his wand. The cloth wove itself around his person, forming
itself into what appeared to be a sailor fuku of red and purple. As he
slowly floated to the ground he felt great... full of power.
"Kupo..." he muttered, looking for Urd, but she had seemingly vanished.
Confident in his newfound magical powers, Mog leapt out from behind his
trash can safety to fight.
As soon as he appeared, the tentacle struck for him, faster than the
eye can see and stronger than a body can withstand. Amazing both
himself and the tentacle, Mog caught it single handedly. It tried to
pull itself out of his grasp, tried to squish the moogle, but Mog was
steadfast.
"Kupo," he informed the demon. "Kupo kupo kupo-po!"
With that, a great energy seemed to flow from the moogle into the
tentacle, which began to writhe in pain as it grew brighter and
brighter, eventually flashing a bright white and vanishing.
"Holy crap!" muttered a nearby bum to the moogle. "What the hell are
you?"
"Kupo!" Mog said. "Kupo!"
With that, the moogle flew off into the night, a trail of hearts and
stars behind him.
"Holy crap!" muttered the bum to his thumb. "What the hell are you?"
end part one
This is the latest incarnation of Magical Moogle Sailor Mog. Consider
it a re-write. None of the characters presented below are entirely in
line with their creator's vision. This is intentional. Following
each chapter are notes delineating who they are in this story.
All fictional characters are the intellectual property of their
creators, but the wrinkles in your brain are yours alone.
---
Magical Moogle Sailor Mog
by Coorlim
Begin with a dimension of abstract thought given life. A dimension
created by the creative process of great minds and sustained by
generations of belief. A dimension filled with the myths and legends
of humanity, freed to live as they would cut off from their creators,
eagerly seeking to expand past their boundaries to become something
more, yet equally eager to have even as little free will as we, yet
again burdened with the omnipotent knowledge that such a feat can
never be accomplished. their names are Zeus and Gilgamesh and Beowulf
and Yaweh and Baal and Indra; they are legion, and they are filled
with an envious hatred for us.
Shift a little bit closer to us, still within the realm of imagination
but closer to home both temporally and in identifiability. This
dimension too is created by the act of creation and sustained with
less rote but often more rabid devotion. This dimension is much
younger, created by the popular culture of the day, ofttimes burning
out and being reborn. In ages past this was home to beings calling
themselves Tom Sawyer and Sherlock Holmes and Vlad Dracul and Doc
Savage. They come and go as their presence in our minds waxes and
wanes, but now this realm is populated by beings knowing themselves as
Buffy and Mulder and Goku and Pikachu. They are like unto the Gods
and Demons of that other dimension, but are not cursed with the
knowledge of their true natures. They live and learn and love in
their reality, slipping from our control the moment they are born from
our minds.
Zoom in.
The primary object in this dimension (though not necessarily the
largest) is a vaguely spherical planetoid. their "earth". Even from
orbit its deviation from our home is visible. Much of it is an almost
impossibly large urban sprawl known to its dwellers simply as The
City. Surrounding the city is a narrow belt of suburbia, and beyond
that a shifting and malleable wilderness.
Zoom in.
The City itself seems to be constructed of a mishmash of contemporary
styles, but inspection reveals that it is loosely divided into
districts. Each of these districts bears a resemblance to and wears
the name of one of our cities on earth. Chicago district, New York
district, London district, Tokyo district, Hong Kong district... they
are uncountable, and sometimes move and shift about when they think
that nobody is looking. For their part, the dwellers never seem to
notice.
The dwellers of story have their own stories.
-----
Just beyond the suburbs in a peaceful grove in a peaceful tree, a
moogle lays dreaming. He has a cute little cottage in the tree, as
moogles are wont to do. When asked to describe the living habits of
wild moogles, City University Kawaiiology major Shiratori Azusa noted
that they "have the decorating taste and fashion sense of my
grandmother." If this is considered to be accurate, then this moogle
was living the moogle lifestyle to its fullest. Everything was
decorated in light pastels. Delicate lace doilies protected its
precious furniture from errant mugs of delicious hot cocoa. There
were ceramic figurines everywhere.
The moogle itself, Mog by name, was sleeping peacefully in a
comfortable bed with a multicolored quilt drawn up around itself.
Externally, Mog was your typical moogle. About two feet tall, covered
in soft white fur, delicate red nose, wings, and a stubby little tail.
Oh, and a kupo. Mog was proud of his kupo. It stood up straight and
proud from his forehead, a natural curve to it but without any sag.
What was often referred to by non-moogles as "that stupid ball thing
on your head" was a source of great pride for all moogles, and all of
the ones Mog knew agreed that his kupo was fairly impressive.
In his sleep Mog was having THAT dream again. You know the one.
You're sitting in school, and suddenly you notice that you're bare
ass nekkid. Mog hated that dream, but he wasn't sure why as he'd
never been to a school in his life (his parents had him home schooled)
and moogles didn't wear any clothes... well, his cousin Kug wore a T-
shirt, but nobody liked to talk about it.
Fortunately, Mog's nightmare was interrupted by the shrill ringing of
his alarm clock. "Ku...?" he mumbled, glaring at it blearily with one
eye. It was bright yellow and shaped like a large yellow bird.
"KUPO!" Mog sword upon seeing the time, leaping from his bed as if it
were on fire. In his rush to the bathroom, he almost knocked over his
display case of ceramic Hummel figures. After a quick shower, he
grabbed a sack filled with... things... and ran out the door.
---
Mog raced fretfully along the road leading from his home forest
towards the City. As he half-ran, half-flew along (Moogles are good at
neither) a young blonde man on a motorcycle pulled up next to him,
inadvertently pelting the freshly showered moogle with road dust.
"Hey Mog!" asked his friend Cloud, slowing his bike to match the
moogle's progress. "What's the hurry, little guy?"
"Kupo!" Mog managed to wheeze, out of breath from the long ten minute
rush from his house, almost an entire two-hundred meters from his
house.
Cloud raised an eyebrow at the exhausted moogle. "Late? Late for
what? You don't DO anything."
Mog gasped and wheezed as he let this sink in. He blinked and stopped
running. Cloud was not so fortunate with his attention diverted to
the moogle and rammed into a telephone pole. Concerned, Mog wandered
up to him.
"Kupopo?"
Cloud winced, getting up. "Ow. Nah, I'm fine," he sighed deeply,
righting his motorcycle. "As long as you're up, you may as well join
me on my way to Aeris's place in the Burbs.
"Kupo!" Mog corrected.
Cloud shrugged, lifting Mog up into his bike's sidecar. "Aeris,
Aerith, who cares? Its all about the nookie!"
Mog joined his friend in a ribald snicker, but he was fairly clueless
when it came to matters of human sexuality. He was vaguely aware that
humans did have two different genders, but knew it was impolite to
ask one of them which one they were.
After a quick if somewhat erratic drive into the Burbs, Cloud and Mog
arrived at Aeris's (or Aerith's) house. Like most houses in the
Burbs, it was a white two story ranch style house with spacious front
and back yards surrounded by a white picket fence. Cloud admired the
fact that although Aeris was a high school senior like himself, she
had her own place, one that she had inherited when her parents had
died in that horrible and mysterious car crash last year. He had no
idea why she got all quiet whenever he told her how lucky she was that
both her parents were dead. Sometimes he wished his mom would die...
he'd learned to keep thoughts like that to himself, though.
Mog followed Cloud as he strode up the front walk to knock on the
door, sniffing at all of the interesting things laying about her yard.
Flowers, rocks, old newspapers... all had a story to tell, and Mog
wanted to hear all of them. After a moment or so Aeris opened her
door, wearing a red silk robe.
"Cloud!" she muttered, "What a... surprise..."
"Hiya Honey!" Cloud replied joyfully, kissing her chastely on the
cheek. "D'ja miss me?"
Aerith glanced over her shoulder briefly, then looked back at Cloud.
"Yeah... sure... gimmie a second to pick up a bit..."
She closed the door and Cloud spun around to face the moogle almost
angrily. "Do NOT mess this up for me, Mog!"
Behind Cloud a window opened almost silently to emit a tall, dark
haired man naked except the black and red trench coat that he was
hurriedly slipping on. Mog vaguely recognized him as Vincent. Mog
was about to wave to them when Cloud snapped his fingers, catching his
attention again.
"Listen, Mog, things between Aeris and I haven't been going so well
lately. I think its cuz she's a virgin, and intimidated by my
sexuality. If I'm gonna pop that cherry, everything has got to go
just right, you got it?"
Mog sighed as behind Cloud Vincent helped Tifa out of the window,
wearing nothing but a satin sheet. He helped her silently to the
ground and the two of them crept silently away, keeping an eye on
Cloud. This saddened Mog, apparently they'd missed some sort of
costume party.
"Do you understand?" Cloud asked again.
"Kupo," Mog acknowledged. It was just as well, he'd left his Loch
Ness Monster costume at home, and he didn't think Cloud was wearing a
costume... he always dressed like that.
"Good," Cloud grunted, apparently satisfied. He stood up just as
Aeris re-opened the front door, this time dressed in a frumpy and
conservative house dress.
"Come on in," she beckoned, opening the door wide. "Its just me here,
all by myself." She gestured, showing that no one was left inside,
except for Barret, who was disguised as a lamp.
Cloud sniffed. The entire place smelled slightly of incense. He'd
decided that he'd make Aeris give up all of that hippy crap when she
married him.
"Why Cloud," began Aeris, looking down at Mog. "You've brought along
a... thing."
Mog bowed deeply to Aeris. "Kupo!"
Leaping on the topic of conversation, Cloud eagerly pointed at his
friend. "This is my good friend Mog. He's a moogle. You want him?"
Aeris glanced over into the kitchen. "I wouldn't know what to feed
it..."
Cloud smacked Mog's hand, which had been scratching another far less
appropriate part of the moogle's anatomy.
"Why don't you have a seat on the couch?" Aeris suggested. "I'll...
be right back."
While Aeris hurried into the kitchen to tell Cid to shut the fuck up,
her boyfriend was here, and to sneak out the back way, Cloud sat
himself down on the couch and put his feet up on a footstool that
looked quite a bit like Red XIII with a tablecloth draped over him.
Moments later Aeris returned from the kitchen, wiping her mouth. She
winced as the back door slammed shut.
"Gee, Aeris," Cloud commented. "I think yer lamp might be busted. I
keep pulling on the lamp cord, but all it does is make an odd grunting
noise..."
"Uh, Cloud?" Aeris interrupted him. "Your little friend seems to be
urinating on my rug."
Cloud's head whipped around to see the errant moogle doing just what
had been described.
"MOG! NOOO!"
Mog looked up at his friend, not pausing in his urinational joy.
"Kupo?"
-----
"You've REALLY done it this time, Mog!" Cloud yelled at the cowering
moogle.
The pair of them were standing in the street in front of Aeris's
house. She'd drawn the curtains and begun to imagine that they'd gone
away.
"Kupo..." Mog muttered sadly, staring at his toes. He hadn't meant to
befoul his friend's friend's carpet, he was just confused by the color
scheme and had thought it to be a urinal.
"No excuses!" Cloud interrupted. "You've ruined my relationship with
Aeris!"
"Ku..." Mog began, tugging on Cloud's pant leg. Angrily, he tore
himself away, turning his back on the poor moogle.
"I never want to see you again!" Cloud screamed.
A rusty iron spike driven deep into his heart, Mog choked off a sob
and reached trembling for Cloud's pant leg again. Furious, the blond
human tore away and stalked off into the night. Bursting into tears,
Mog ran off into the night.
---
A savage and uncaring rain pelted the tiny moogle as he wandered the
streets of the Kowloon ward. Unlike most of the Hong Kong district,
one of the City's great island districts, the Kowloon ward was part of
the mainland. It wasn't a particularly nice ward, and the few people
out in the driving rain that noticed Mog were giving him speculative
glances.
Moogles were somewhat uncommon in the city, but everyone had at least
heard of one, or seen one on the popular sitcom "Thats my Moogle!" It
was generally accepted that despite the fact that their entire language
seemed to consist of simply the word "kupo" they were sentient
creatures with all of the rights of any other person. Still, some
people wondered what they tasted like.
Out of breath and waterlogged, Mog stopped under an awning to rest.
He was miserable, freezing and soaking wet. He sneezed. Realizing
that he'd almost certainly get sick if he didn't get dry soon, he
pushed his way into the door at his side.
The interior of the shop was dimly lit by a number of curious smelling
candles. Mixing in with the warm smell of the wax was an even
curiouser aromic mix of musk and incense. It would have made Mog
sleepy had it not been for the strange designs on the walls. Most of
them looked like interconnected concentric circles. Somehow they made
his brain throb. He was about to turn back out onto the street when a
soft voice called from beyond a beaded curtain, "Leaving so soon?"
Mog squinted into the dim light as a woman emerged from the back room.
She was tall, her dark skin contrasting with ivory white hair.
Although Mog couldn't see her too well, it looked like she has some
kind of strange markings on her face. She seemed to be looking around
for something, a bit confused.
"Kupo," called Mog from the ground. The woman blinked and looked at it
for a moment in obvious surprise. "A moogle..." she muttered,
"interesting."
She stepped forward into the front of her shop carrying a silver tray.
"Why go out into the rain, Little One," she purred, "when you can dry
off in here and have a nice cup of tea?"
Mog considered while it tried to remember what its mother had told him
about taking things from strange ladies. "Kupo?" it asked.
"Yes," the woman laughed. "I have crumpets."
Deciding that his mother was probably pro mystery tea and crumpets
(she was that kind of lady), Mog waddled up to the table that the lady
had set the tray upon and sat upon the milk carton she had placed upon
a chair for it.
"My name is Urd," the woman introduced, pouring it a cup of tea, "and
I'm a fortune teller."
"Kupo-po," Mog smirked, dunking something that it'd found on his run
through the city into his tea.
Urd smiled indulgently. "Oh, a skeptic?" Mog nodded. "Then you don't
mind if I read your... paw... do you?"
Mog shrugged, sipping its tea. It was all bullshit anyway.
Everything faded the moment Urd took Mog's paw, suddenly, and without
pretext. He found himself floating in a vast dark sky, high above what
looked sort of like his favorite miniature golf course. There was a
castle, and he thought he could see a windmill, but there was just a
village where Abraham Lincoln should be.
His perspective shifted, zooming low towards the castle, and he noticed
that it was populated with moogles! That would, he decided, half to
make this castle much larger than the one over at the Par King, or
would make those some damn small moogles. He was about to start
looking for the hole that the ball went into when a disturbance caught
his eye.
A rift had appeared in the air in the middle of the courtyard, seeming
to be a tear in the fabric of time and space itself. From it emerged
two disgusting looking demons who immediately took it upon themselves
to begin slaughtering the castle moogles. Mog covered his eyes in fear.
When he peeked again, the demons had made it to the inner keep and were
trying to break through its walls. Much to his surprise, a moogle that
looked exactly like himself (and they can tell the difference) wearing
a crown appeared at the top of the keep.
"KUPO!" the vision-mog shouted, leaping over the castle wall, a strange
glowing energy streaming from his limbs. He was followed by a number
of similarly glowing moogles, all echoing the battle cry. Just as the
battle was joined, Mog's vision faded to black again.
Snapped back to reality inside of the fortune teller's shop, Mog
tumbled off of his milk carton, cracked his head on her table, and
flipped the tea set over on top of him. Only the scalding heat of the
tea kept him from slipping unconscious, and he immediately leapt up and
started to run around, screaming. Urd watched this in horror for a few
moments before throwing a bucket of cold water on him.
"Ku... KUPO?!?" Mog sputtered, staring wildly at the woman.
"Well, you seemed like you were burnt, so I grabbed the bucket I was
using for the leak in the kitchen's roof..." Urd began lamely.
"Kupo," Mog cried dismissively. "KUPO!" he finished, waving his arms
vaguely.
"Oh, that," Urd finished, picking up her tea set. "That was a vision
of the past."
"Kupo?" Mog considered. "Kupo kupo."
Urd looked slyly over at the confused moogle. "Why, your past, Prince
Mog."
"Kupo?" Mog asked, almost laughing. "Kupo ku-popo."
A solemn look took over Urds face. "PRINCE Mog, there is a very good
reason you don't remember any of that. The world as it is now is not
as it always was... even history itself is mutable to those who can
bend time to their will. "
Mog snorted. She must have drugged his tea... she was obviously
unhinged. "Kuuuupo," he chuckled, heading back to the door.
"Wait, Mog!" Urd cried.
"Kupo!" Mog cried cheerfully as he stepped out the door. Urd sighed as
she watched him leave. With a wave of her hand, the tea set and table
cleaned itself up.
The moogle... she hadn't been expecting that one to be the first. The
communications gulf wasn't a problem... she could speak every language
that had been spoken, and a few that hadn't. It was just going to be
difficult to use a moogle as she intended to use the first.
She was considering changing 'the plan' when the decision was taken
from her hands.
---
Mog chuckled again as he trod off down the street. Him! A prince!
He was sure he'd remember something like that. No, it was most likely
that the crazy Urd lady was just trying to drug and kidnap him in
order to do things to him. He didn't know what kind of things, but he
was sure he wouldn't like them. He couldn't wait to tell Cloud about
it!
He almost stumbled at that thought. Cloud, his friend, hated him. He
didn't like to dwell on it overmuch, but it had never been that easy
for Mog to make friends. Sad as it seemed, most humans couldn't
understand plain mooglish. Beyond that, he really didn't have many
moogle friends either. He wasn't a self-hating moogle, he just
preferred the company of humans.
And now... now he had nobody. He was alone, again, just like before...
Mog snapped out of his introspection to notice that he'd wandered into
a narrow dead end alleyway. He was a country moogle, but even he knew
what a dangerous predicament that was. He turned to leave, only to
hear something slither through the trash lining the alley.
Instinctively he froze.
At first, all he could hear was his own heartbeat and the dripping of
water from the gutters on the buildings to the street. Maybe, he
hoped, it was just a cat, or a bum. He took a tentative step towards
the alley's mouth, only to hear the slithering sound behind him, the
sound sending him into a panicked scamper.
Pain lanced through the moogle's body as something struck him from
behind, almost tearing his left wing. Mog went tumbling through the
air, rolling when he hit the ground. He blinked and sat up, just in
time to see an enormous tentacle swinging in his direction.
Again Mog tried to dodge out of the way, but he was nowhere near fast
enough. The tentacle, almost as thick as the moogle himself, lashed
him fast across the face breaking open the skin of his forehead.
Blinded by blood and pain, the moogle scrambled madly for cover,
leaping behind a pair of garbage cans.
Urd's image appeared in his mind's eye, superimposed against the gritty
Kowloon streets. "-sure you're doing that right?" she was asking
someone that Mog couldn't see. As if noticing him, she suddenly stood
perfectly straight and addressed him imperially. "Still don't believe
in magic, Prince Mog?"
"Kupo!" Mog nodded vigorously. "Kupo... Kupo-po!"
Urd's face grew a little grim. "I would stop it if I could, Mog, but
none of it is my doing. What is attacking you is a demon, like those
in your vision, and it will kill you if it can."
"Kupo? Ku-po!" Mog begged so pathetically it almost made Urd cry. He
could hear the tentacle thing snuffling around, looking for him.
Urd shook her head sadly. "I cannot help you, Prince Mog, only you can
fight them."
"Kupo?!?" Mog asked incredulously. "Kupo!"
"You must fight them, Prince Mog, or you will die." Seeing his fear,
Urd's face softened. "Take this," she said, handing him a wand. "The
demons have stolen much of your power, but if you wave that wand and
say," she paused, rolling her eyes. "Moogle Powers Activate," she
seemed to shudder, "you will be able to access those that you still
have."
Mog looked down at the wand in awe. A magic wand! He held it aloft
and spoke, "KUPO!"
In a flash of light time seemed to slow down, and the street appeared
to be brightly lit by an ambient purple glow. Mog felt himself lifted
into the air, slowly and gently, as light and cloth streamed from the
end of his wand. The cloth wove itself around his person, forming
itself into what appeared to be a sailor fuku of red and purple. As he
slowly floated to the ground he felt great... full of power.
"Kupo..." he muttered, looking for Urd, but she had seemingly vanished.
Confident in his newfound magical powers, Mog leapt out from behind his
trash can safety to fight.
As soon as he appeared, the tentacle struck for him, faster than the
eye can see and stronger than a body can withstand. Amazing both
himself and the tentacle, Mog caught it single handedly. It tried to
pull itself out of his grasp, tried to squish the moogle, but Mog was
steadfast.
"Kupo," he informed the demon. "Kupo kupo kupo-po!"
With that, a great energy seemed to flow from the moogle into the
tentacle, which began to writhe in pain as it grew brighter and
brighter, eventually flashing a bright white and vanishing.
"Holy crap!" muttered a nearby bum to the moogle. "What the hell are
you?"
"Kupo!" Mog said. "Kupo!"
With that, the moogle flew off into the night, a trail of hearts and
stars behind him.
"Holy crap!" muttered the bum to his thumb. "What the hell are you?"
end part one